Wednesday, January 09, 2008

Fluffy dreams

I sometimes am that person who does not follow through. My head and heart become so filled with ideas, desires, energy and hopes. I write ideas down, I share them impassionedly with friends, I begin projects, I research the next step following the dream…and then I become bogged down with the ordinary busyness of life, of working, of sleeping, of being distracted by television, shopping, or even good things like volunteering. The great dreams and intentions are left in the wayside and some float away, like cirrus clouds on a windy day. I so want to be a person who follows through--but more and more I am becoming a person who dreams and plans and drops the ball.

Here are some of the goals I have so passionately planned, but not accomplished, this year.

--Paint Christmas gifts for closest friends and family
--Learn how to knit and make personalized gifts
--Learn how to play the guitar
--Find a roommate and move
--Loose weight
--Meet regularly with my mentor
--Find a missionary mentor
--Clean out closets
--Give away ½ of my wardrobe and shoes
--Establish regular communication with Grace Farm orphans
--Find a home for my cat, Solomon
--Take a weekend massage course
--Enroll in Midwifery school

--Deep clean the duplex
--Encourage at least one person daily in writing

Some people call individuals like me who have grand ideas and intentions—but rarely finish a project--dreamers and visionaries. That is kind way of describing us.

This is such an amazing time in my life to accomplish goals. I am single, have some savings, and have resources through church, work and friends to accomplish my goals. Yet so many are just unmet goals that take a place on a crumpled list that is painful for me to look at as it represents this part of my character that I dislike.

I am so glad that Jesus was not just a visionary. He was a get up and do it now, why wait for another day kind of person. I am so glad He was not a procrastinator.

Balance. Follow through. How to find it, how to maintain it, that is a mystery to me.

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