Enthusiasm and the ordinary
The root of enthusiasm is "Go in". I like that! I am so thrilled that God is taking me on this journey with Him into Sudan. In the midst of intimidating changes in my life and church and with the huge task of asking hundreds of people to partner with me, I am so grateful that God is leading this move and I rest in the knowledge that He carries me.
With great enthusiasm I look toward the move and the mountain of learning and adjustments just beginning when I board that international flight next year. But in the logistic here stateside--of writing newsletters, raising support, managing a list-serve database that completely confusing me, asking people in a troubled economy to add another section to their budget--my enthusiasm wanes. I am learning that much of ministry is not "ministry" in the classic, spiritual sense, but just work--tedious logistics, hours at the computer with little to show for it, muddling about in technical computer programs, gathering the courage to begin learning a new language...
I have new respect and understanding for missionaries, pastors, worship leaders, etc.
When intimidated by things I have not done before I become a dreadful procrastinator. This laziness/procrastination disappoints me daily and results in a much delayed first newsletter and prayer card and getting my list-serve set up. I'm finally asking for assistance with the computer components of producing and developing them--so hopefully I will have information out to everyone soon. Obviously I cannot dive into ministry in Africa until goals are met here, so I am setting my face and plodding ahead through the ordinariness of "getting to the mission field." I have so much to learn and grow in... I believe I've romanticized being a missionary and serving God on the field. I forget that Jesus plodded through the mundane in dusty sandals.
"Work is love made visible." --Kahlil Gilbran